1. How exactly can newborn children get in trouble with the law?
2. Which mountain is going to get them? When? How? Does this become important in the series finale?
3. I'll let "Never meaning no harm," pass, but "Beats all you never saw,"?!?!?
4.
How come Daisy doesn't warrant a mention? She's usually quite important
to the plans, what with dressing up in a bikini to distract EVIL TRUCK
DRIVERS, and so on.
Do it again and have it on my desk by Monday.
Whoever is responsible for the endless training software they make me
do at the pub needs their head broken. Today it showed me a cartoon of
a man with all the skin on his hand burned away and just bones there,
and asked me what I'd do if there was a fire in a hotel. Apparently
running away screaming is not the correct response to either of these
things. Who knew?
I have four days off so I can return to living
my real life where I get up after midday and then go back to bed
immediately with a book, or watch seventeen episodes of Scrubs in a
row. Or sobbing and wanking in the wardrobe.
Also someone needs
to arrange for my dreams to be irritatingly mundane ("Oh no, I have
overslept and missed my A-level Physics exam! I have found a crisp five
pound note in my pocket, but I now realise I am dreaming and there is
no five pound note there! Again!") again instead of being better and
more exciting ("London has become a seaside resort! With a mountain!
And kissing!") than being awake.
Does anyone want to join me
sitting on the floor and drinking beer dressed only in dressing gown
and pants tomorrow? We can lean out the window and shout abuse and
everything!
Maybe if I set up a webcam I can get funding from
the Arts Council as some sort of living exhibit and never work again.
Good night internet!
