August 2003 Archives

Fairly innocently, I board the tube, with my copy of Is Shane MacGowan Still Alive?. An Irish man asks me what it is I'm reading. This is odd, since a) it is the tube, where talking to strangers is ILLEGAL, and b) since he had a strange smell about him.

After donning his glasses, he deciphered the cover of the book. As the above link probably details, it is about Ireland. Being Irish he took exception to this.

"Thas all bollocks mate."
"Yes, probably."
"Why'd you buy it, you got Irish relatives or summit?"
"Um, I read something else by the writer and..."
"Never go there." (gestures to book) "You can never escape."
"Um."
"Oh, ye can physically get out, but in here" (gestures to head) "You can never escape."
"Um."
"I came from there. I like English people much better than Irish people. We use different words to mean the same thing, you know?"
"Um."
"You can never escape. Never go there, you hear me! I bet you regret talking to me!"
"Um."

Is roughly how it went. At this point he and his smell decided to abandon me.

I had to research the history of Ann Summers just now, which involved looking at websites with ladies in bras in and everything!

Also: The Chairman of Coca Cola is called Doug Daft.

Someone just said "Total wordage"!

This week I am mainly doing some work experience at the Independent on Sunday. So far I have spent 95% of the time surfing the worldwide super internet buslane, but for a change the other 5% hasn't been filled with wanking and toasted cheese sandwiches, but with doing Things for journalists. Apparently it gets busier from tomorrow, what with having to be out on Sunday. Why not look out for an exciting article about modern poetry not being very popular that I keep hearing a loud man talk about?

I am somewhat disappointed that no-one has introduced themselves as Name 'Scoop' Surname, and journalism loses points.

Also: The Docklands Light Railway! I hadn't been on it before. It's like something from a 1970s science fiction show! I hope it is called 'Light' because it runs off of lasers!

Yesterday I overheard an old man reminiscing about how happy he'd been when they invented choc ices. This pleased me immensely, and according to http://www.piemonte-emozioni.it/emozioni/percorsi/eng/1/gr_shop.htm is perfectly possible, which is even better.